Through My Lens

There are reasons I don't generally join professional organizations. Even though my best friend laughs when I say I do not play well with others, there's something to that.

I occasionally read wedding magazines because I work in the industry. I need to see what's going on, what's popular, and what brides are being told. Otherwise, I would be caught off guard when a bride said something like, "In one word, how would you describe your style?"

We, my husband and I, try to shoot a mix of what's trendy now, and what will not look dated in 20 years.The classic stuff will always work, but working in what's popular right now will make people happy right now.

Some of the "Big Day Photo Checklists" and other info are quite useful. Some are not. I always find it amusing when there's an article about "What To Look For in a Photographer" or "What to Ask Your Photographer" written by photographers, not newlyweds. Often, those are filled with things like, "Ask what professional organizations they belong to. I belong to XYZ. Ask what their training is. I trained at ABC." I want to say, hey, ask couples what they liked or didn't like about their photos and their experience! This is not a commercial for you.

One of the most aggravating interviews I ever read was a photographer who said, "When people ask me how much I charge, I say, 'I'm the most expensive photographer in the tri-state area. Would you like to continue this conversation?' I'm worth it." Wow. I think I do amazing work, but I would never tie the quality of what I do to a price, and I like to think that I'm not an egotistical jerk.

Tonight, I opened a wedding magazine and flipped through. Although I've never had a bride ask for one, I'm aware that day after (or after reception) shoots with the bride and groom up to their knees (or higher) in surf are popular. They can look lovely. Ditto for freeze frames of the couple or wedding party jumping into a pool. I could not imagine someone asking for the shots one photographer put on their full page ad. In one, a soaking wet bride floated, arms spread and eyes closed, in an indeterminate body of water, with a few random branches poking out. They'd tweaked the color, so everything, including the bride's skin and white dress, were a gray-blue. It looked like a crime scene photo. It was ghastly.

Another shot showed a bride with a billowing train and hair, Photoshopped so it looked as if she was on fire. Yes, engulfed in leaping flames. As a standard portrait, it might be just what the client wanted, but as a wedding image? What does this photographer think about marriage? Who asked for these shots? It was ... there are no words.

I thought of this essay I wrote a few years ago. Although what got me writing was my frustration with society's eroding idea of what is and isn't beautiful, I think it also says something about why I take photos, and why I'm mentally framing them even when I'm not shooting - and why none of my bridal portraits look like they belong on CSI.

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It seems to me that a lot of people become photographers so they can take photos of beautiful people. This seems to be especially true of men, who hope to spend their days gazing at gorgeous women. If they're scantily clad women, all the better.

Some of the work of mine that I am proudest of is photos of people not generally considered to be gorgeous. Naturally, my husband and I also have beautiful photos of beautiful people. Some of our best work is of our nieces, and our nieces are stunning. It's easy to take photos of them that make people go, "Ooooh!" In fact, someone once asked my husband if I minded him doing the photo shoot of the sultry blonde by the waterfall, and he barked in answer, "Hey! That's my niece!"

I'm a very minimalist, naturalistic photographer. I want to use the least amount of equipment and time possible. I am not the kind of photographer who needs two assistants, a huge battery pack and lots of reflectors to do a shoot in the park. Occasionally I find myself wishing I had a reflector or a big, filtering drape, because it's possible to get gorgeous, soft light and minimal shadows that way. Without that kind of setup, I have to forgo particular locations because the sun isn't right. I'm sometimes annoyed by shadows under people's chins, but that's OK. I want to travel light, and I don't want to take all day setting up a simple head shot.

I also do not want to spend too much time after the photos are taken cropping, editing, Photoshopping. If I've done my job right, the photos don't need much. So, I tend to use Photoshop only for special effects – one of the most popular is colorized black and white. My husband is a wiz with the computer, and so is my daughter, so I usually just turn them loose.

It takes a lot more thought to pose your subject so they look their best, instead of just trimming their thighs in the computer. I'm not perfect, but I work hard at showcasing strengths. Sometimes, it's hard work. Some of it's simple stuff, like being higher than the subject's eye level in order to mitigate a double or receding chin. Sometimes it's as easy as simply believing that they're attractive.

I miss the days gone by when it was taken for granted that people were attractive. If you were entering a room full of people, it was assumed that all but a tiny percent were attractive. That was especially true of women – a room full of women was assumed to be a room full of beauty. Now, it's assumed that if you walk into a room full of women, a tiny percentage will be beautiful. Look at pinup photos from the 1950s or earlier. By today's standards, the women are overweight, flabby and plain. I happen to believe we have it wrong now, and we had it right then. All women are lovely, all men are handsome, with very few exceptions. Why have we come to believe that beauty is rare?

I hate it when I wear something and I receive compliments because "it's slenderizing." Can't I look good and be round? And don't even get me started on the current viciousness of criticizing photos of celebrities. "She's only 23 and has cellulite!" "She has no business wearing a bikini!" "Look at her without makeup!" I even hate it when it's supposed to be complimentary. I once saw a photo in a magazine of a movie star leaving the gym. "She doesn't use her workout as an excuse not to look good!" the caption said, going on to compliment her outfit. So people are supposed to feel bad if they work out in sweats and no makeup and get sweaty? Oh, my goodness! This is what happens to a society that has too much time and prosperity on its hands!

But I digress.

I once shot family photos for a young family celebrating the arrival of their second child. We shot outdoors in one of my favorite parks, and did several configurations, including shots of just the kids and just mom and dad. I was happy with most of the photos, and especially happy with one of the couple. They both looked happy and radiant. You would not have looked at this young mother and thought about the fatigue of delivery, about the fact that it had been less than a month since the birth and while her body was recovering she was enduring sleepless nights. You thought of love and happiness.

I saw this young mom a few weeks later at a Scout event. She made a point of telling me that she loved the photos. It turned out that my favorite shot of the couple was also her favorite. "My husband tells me all the time that I'm beautiful, but I never saw it until I looked at that photo. Then I thought, 'Oh, my gosh, I'm pretty,'" she said. That's a good day for me.

I very much enjoy shooting high school senior portraits. They're some of the most important photos taken of teenagers, and I want very much for them to be happy with the photos and the experience. Every one of them, and their parents, has a different idea of what that might be. I have some locations and poses that I use frequently, but every subject has to be approached as an individual. A lot of the portraits I shoot are of fresh scrubbed, well coifed girls surrounded by meadows and flowers, but I'm also good at grittier images, with pierced kids in black, against backdrops of concrete, chain link and grafitti. I try to make some images that will make parents and grandparents happy, some that make the teen happy, and hopefully some that will still be treasured years from now.

Everybody wants great photos, but not everybody looks like a model. Therefore, you can't proceed on the idea that you can only take great portraits of people who look like models.

A few years ago one of my senior portrait clients was a very large girl – she was not chubby or pudgy, she was much larger than my 250 lb. husband. She was also pleasant, had a lovely smile, was well dressed and impeccably groomed. Instead of deciding that the photos were going to be about a fat girl, I decided that they would be about a girl with a delightful smile and impeccable grooming. I placed her hands so that you could see her elaborate manicure in many of the photos. She was happy with them, no mean feat when society tells you that you're unacceptable, and I liked them so much that I included one in our first senior portrait brochure.

I've gotten much better over the years at wedding photos, and much more confident in my ability to do good work. Plus, the fact that I'm no longer processing film means that I can shoot more photos for less cost, which is a great thing. Still, one of the weddings I'm proudest of was shot almost two decades ago, and I wasn't paid for it – it was a favor for a friend.

The bride was very, very pregnant. She was due just a few weeks after the wedding. It was very obvious; there was no hiding it. It would never be possible to pretend that she wasn't pregnant at her wedding, even if it was advisable (and I don't think it was. With a few exceptions, revisionist history is a bad idea.) When the bride first emerged from the dressing room in her traditional floor length white gown and veil, her mother said, "Oh, Heather," in a tone of extreme disappointment and disapproval, as though she'd sold advertising space for a pig farm on her train.

OK, a very pregnant bride looks more like a bad punchline than a little girl's (or mother's) dream. But it was her wedding day, her first and, God willing, only wedding. She deserved to feel like a princess, and she needed beautiful portraits to hang on her wall, the same as any other bride. Clearly, so did her mom.

I can't guarantee feeling like a princess (though I can help), but I can do something about beautiful portraits.

For her bridal portraits, I shot them two ways, two ways that I shoot every bride. I shot close ups of her from the chest up. Then I had her face away from me. I spread her train out behind her and had her look back over her shoulder at me, with her bouquet perched on one hip. It's a great shot that highlights the dress, the veil, the hairdo, the flowers – everything that makes this day different. As I usually do, I also added her husband to that pose, with him standing in front of her just slightly off center with his hands on her waist, looking straight over her shoulder and into the camera.

Then, I shot the rest of the couple portraits as close ups, with the frame stopping just below her chest. Again, those are usually any couple's favorite poses anyway, and so this unconventional bride had lovely portraits that looked just like everyone else's. For the family photos, too, I tried to keep them waist up. In a lot of the photos, certainly the group and distance photos, you can see her tummy, but her mother would never be embarrassed with the portraits of her daughter or the couple hanging on her wall for all her friends to see.

I once saw photos of a casual wedding that had me squirming, wishing desperately that I had been the photographer. The bride and groom were both in blue jeans and tennis shoes, and the photo was full length. I immediately saw how I would have shot it. The bride, despite being in a casual shirt and jeans, had a traditional, flowing veil. It was obviously important to her and made her feel like a bride. She carried a bouquet. They were also standing on a riverbank, with all that lovely water behind them.

Quite often, one of a couple's favorite wedding portraits is the close up I usually take with their faces cheek to cheek. I frame it so that you rarely even see even the collar of the tuxedo; it's just two glowingly happy faces. Or I have the bride tuck her bouquet up just under their chins, so it's two faces over the flowers. That's how I would have shot that couple – close up, cheek to cheek, with her bouquet just under their faces and the river shining behind them. They would have had a lovely portrait that said, "Wedding!" loudly. I would have shot a portrait of just the bride the same way. I often take photos for brides who have spent a great deal of money on their dream gown (that they shopped for for months,) and their favorite bridal portrait is the close up with their flowers tucked right under their chins. You don't even see the gown, but it's a flattering portrait that immediately says, "Bride!", especially if she's wearing a veil. I wished I'd been able to give the bride on the riverbank those photos of her day.

Recently I photographed a bride who had none of the traditional trappings. She and her husband were planning a wedding almost a year in the future when circumstances intervened. Due to unexpected changes in their lives, the bride and groom had two days to plan a wedding. She wore a floor length gown, but it was one she already owned, navy blue with a short black jacket. Her hair was up, but it was the same style she wore daily. The groom wore a coat and tie he already owned. They had a sheet cake and no flowers. Still, they had all the feelings every couple has, and wanted a day just as special. They were surrounded by family and friends, they were happy, and they were getting married. They needed lovely photos.

For her close up, I had no flowers to highlight, no fancy hairdo, no tiara or veil. All I had was a bride with a wide, happy smile and her wedding ring. I had her lean on her left hand, with her elbow on a podium, with her fingers tucked under her chin. What you saw was her face and her ring. Hung on her wall, it would look like any other bridal portrait. After my husband filtered it, it looked even more romantic and, well, bridal.

Another of my favorite photos from their wedding was a close up of the couple's hands, rings prominent. I also very much liked the close ups of the hands signing the marriage certificate. They all said, "Wedding! Happy day!" Most importantly, the couple liked their photos. Their handmade thank you to us still hangs in our house.

A girlfriend of mine works for the state, working with families dealing with "special needs" children – those with physical or mental challenges, or both. She asked me to write an article for the organization's newsletter, with tips for photographing children. Some of it is pretty universal – fill the frame, eliminate distractions from the background, use a flash outdoors – but some was tailored to the audience. I didn't write about making the children look "normal," but how to get a flattering angle if your child couldn't sit up, or was in a wheelchair or brace, or drooled. I assumed that, just like all parents, they wanted photos that looked just like their child, but the best of their child. I never heard from the families, but my friend was delighted with the article, and that made me happy.

I became a photographer, not a painter, for a reason. I want a realistic image, not an idealized one. Even so, it would be a crime not to acknowledge the beauty inherent in God's creations. We need to see ourselves, and others, in our best light, in the middle of ordinary circumstances. That's what I try to do every time I push the shutter button.