Sleeping Under The Stars

When I was a kid, houses just didn't have cooling of any kind. Even "rich" families had no more than shutters and fans to combat summer heat.

Our house stayed cooler than many others. Its largest walls faced east/west, and there were large shade trees to the south, so it often felt cool even in the middle of summer. That was in the daytime, though; at night, it was often hot and stuffy.

I can't stand the sensation of wind on my body, or "white noise," so fans were never the solution. An open window just seemed to funnel every traffic noise straight into my head. I absolutely must have covers, at least from the knee down, and preferably from the waist down, even when I'm broiling. Summer nights, it goes without saying, could be miserable, especially when you shared a room and a double bed with a sibling.

I was probably about 11 or 12 when I first asked my mom if I could please, for the love of all that's holy, just sleep outside. It was misery inducing to be playing outdoors in the dark - and I was always outdoors as a kid - and then walk into our comparative oven of a house and be expected to sleep. My sister loved everything that I hated - an open window, a fan and no covers - so sharing a bed made us both, um, grouchy.

We lived on a fairly busy street, but since my parents had purchased the property when it was "way out in the sticks," on a dirt road, they had an acre and a third. We had a huge fenced back yard, and it was impossible to see even the next door neighbors.

I've always been a very solitary being, so the thought of being alone did not disturb me in the slightest. I would have been deeply disconcerted to be within view of the neighbors or passersby on either street (we lived on a corner lot). I felt perfectly safe in the yard. Plus, there were two dogs in the long, narrow kennel that separated the back yard from the horse pasture, and they'd sound the alarm if there were any intruders. I was a tiny bit nervous about the fact that the back door had to be left unlocked, so I could go in and use the bathroom, but the risk seemed small.

We took vacations every year, week long excursions to mountains, lakes, deserts and rivers. Until I was 16, I had only spent two nights in motel rooms; we camped everywhere we went. Even when we weren't camping, we'd be someplace like my cousin's cabin at Mount Shasta, so cots and sleeping bags were familiar. The chaise in the back yard was more comfortable and more padded than sleeping on the ground, which was the vacation norm. I have never been a prissy girl, afraid of bugs and bats or the dark.

The first night was a relief beyond description. It was cool, quiet, private and blissful. "Can I do that every night?" I wanted to know the next morning.

I loved those nights lying on the chaise, looking up at the sky. Staring up into the night sky has never made me feel small and insignificant; it makes me feel connected to everything and everyone. I loved the sound of the crickets, and the occasional songs of frogs. It was just blissful.

I would lie awake and think, and think, and ponder. It was beautiful.

I started spending every summer night in the back yard. It was always a little disappointing when it got too cold to sleep outside, some time around the beginning of the school year.

By the time I was about 14, I could accurately tell you the time any time between about 9:00 p.m. and midnight just by looking up. I had spent so many hours watching the stars crawl across the sky that I knew that if they were in this position, it was about 9:45; if they were here, it was about 11.

Once when I was in high school, a group of us had just left the movies, and someone wanted to know what time it was. I looked up and said, "It's about 10:30." I was instantly subject to all kinds of teasing. "What was that?" "What are you doing?" "How can you tell?" "Do you think you're Magellan or something?"

"No. I just know. See, those stars over there..."

"AH HA HA HA HA!" My peers were unimpressed and unconvinced.

Someone looked at their watch and said, "You're wrong! It's 10:40!"

"First of all, I said, 'about.' And we've been standing here arguing for almost five minutes."

"You just estimated based on what time the movie started."

Well, smartypants, then figure out what time it is on your own. See if I trot out my parlor tricks.

Sometimes, I really miss those nights of lying outside, looking at the stars. My home now is a two story house between other two story houses - I can't do anything in my yard without someone watching. Not that they'd be interested in watching me sleep; I just can't be comfortable in view of so many windows.

When it's dark and cool, and the crickets are chirping, everything in my body relaxes. I'd love a chaise, or a hammock, or better yet, a big comfy bed, out under the stars.

It's starting to get uncomfortably warm at night. Last night it was hot and stuffy, and I missed my days on the back yard chaise.

If I'm ever in a nursing home some day, and they complain that I wander off at night, just tell them to let me sleep on the patio. Trust me - we'll all be happier that way.